User blog comment:Holokami/Character Sheet: A'shada/@comment-4867780-20171216122953/@comment-26993961-20171217213909

"So despite her transcendent mind and psionic godhood, A'shada cannot remedy something as ordinary as emotional weariness and boredom, that a reasonably skilled normal telepath could easily solve in no time ?"

There's that "Because she can, she must" idealism again. ^^;

Yes, she could easily use her own power to give herself entertainment, and that's likely what she does in her sleep. But it probably becomes less effective the more she does it. Please remember that A'shada is a character, with feelings, wants, needs, etc, not a walking, talking, optimised power set. And I feel you're using specific language to make it look like A'shada treats her people like disposable goods, and completely ignoring A'shada's goal altogether- a goal which she still very much cares about.

A'shada isn't some AI that used cold logic to solve its problems, she's a living breathing entity that has needed to, and still needs to make very tough choices. It's those tough choices, and the constantly repeating mistakes of other races that are a major factor to why she's become tired.

As for her complete lack of interaction with her people, there is a reason for that which I haven't mentioned yet (not finished writing it into the sheet yet), but to summarise: A'shada doesn't want them to rely on her. She needs them to get along and drive forward toward her goal as much as they can in their own way, and she'll step in when absolutely necessary. If she had to carry her entire race because they think "why should we bother when you're that powerful", then that works against her goal, but equally, she can't become a tyrant that cracks the whip on her people to get them to move- she needs them to do it by themselves.

A'shada needs her people to deify her. She needs them to admire and fear her in equal magnitudes. She isn't there to solve petty squabbles and trade deals which can be worked out by the races and her people. When A'shada moves, the universe trembles. When A'shada speaks, the universe listens, When A'shada attacks, entire civilisations are cleaved from existence. When A'shada "blesses", civilisations are hoisted up onto into grand stage the universe. Through this method, her people can detach themselves to enough of a degree from her leadership that they get on and improve themselves, but she can still hold them close enough that her words matter.

A'shada feels it's her duty and her life's mission to bring about this universal utopia, and she can't do that being all apathetic and distant of everything from some higher place, so she forces herself to maintain a struggle which is "boring" in her mind, she fights to maintain her desires which she doesn't want to lose, she grinds herself down to keep a hold of her emotions so she can understand those "beneath her", and honestly, she's actually frightened of what she'd do if she lost her attachment to everything entirely. Yet she needs to be so powerful to keep away things that would threaten the universe, a level of power which causes these problems. She's a people who has become a god protect to guide her people and the races of the universe, yet struggles to maintain an attachment to those things because of her power.